Thursday, 11 February 2010

Secret Orders


Every week, on the same day and at the same time, the good ladies of the local Women's Institute (WI) gather their wares to sell. There is a cake stall, a savoury stall (pies, sausages rolls, flans and quiches etc), a vegetable stall, an egg stall, a goats cheese stall, a jam and pickle stall, there are also a couple of craft stalls, though no one ever seems to pay them any attention so I'm not quite sure why they continue showing up, and it is the the cake and savoury stall that have the biggest queues and the highest demand. All goods are homemade and I know from personal tasting experience are all delicious.
It is fair to say that I am often the youngest person in attendance so I can be pretty quick off the mark to ensure I get my greedy little hands on the items I want. Most of the buying public are women, and appear to choose their clothing on the basis of comfort dressing. Heels are definitely out, shape is out, as are jeans, and any form of colour other than grey which if it's matching your hair colour is not terribly flattering. I can ignore all this, but what I have found odd is how unfriendly most of the attendees are. I have attempted engaging them in conversation, but they are not interested and on occassion have been quite rude. One of the ladies behind the stall has implied that it is because I am a newcomer and not to take it personally. I'm not painting an attractive picture here but I believe in being honest and fair, which I discovered not all these ladies are.
I had enlisted handsome husbands assistance as I could not be at the market at opening time which is essential to avoid missing out as items sell fast here. I gave him a list with instructions of which stall to visit first to be sure not to lose out on these popular items. This was his first visit to the the market and as he is a lover of food he was happy to fulfil this task for me. We had arranged to meet at the market about half an hour after opening and as I flounced in I spied him surrounded by 6 women all looking gooey eyed and laughing and giggling.
Surveying the other customers it was simple to see why he was receiving so much attention. There is a distinct lack of gentlemen at these weekly events and the few that are there don't look up to much, and are mostly lurking in the coffee corner looking bored or having a snooze.
Handsome husband did not look comfortable and as I caught his eye, he mouthed "HELP ME". I did feel a bit sorry for him as having a woman who is 30 years older than you (around the same age as his mother) openly flirting would be difficult for any man to stomach. This was the moment where I could re-pay all the times when he has rescued me and gotten me out of one fix or another. So I walked over, grabbed him by the arm and said "There you are, I thought I'd lost you, now have all these ladies sorted you out"? I could see the panic drain away from him and he showed me what he'd purchased with pride. His admirers backed off and he explained that he'd commented that it was unfortunate that there was only one blackberry and apple pie left and that he would have taken more, whereupon the lady whispered to him that they keep some popular items back for 'Special Customers', and that if he wanted another one it wasn't a problem. He had then had the same experience with four of the other ladies who also told him that he could order items and therefore wouldn't need to be there for opening time and could come along anytime before closure.
Not once on all my visits here, had anyone mentioned this private little system, they were keeping it all to themselves, not exactly charitable. Handsome husband has recovered from his ordeal and has begged me never to send him there again, which I won't but I shall reward him for his discovery with my very own buns.





32 comments:

Lady MacB said...

Ooh, those Calendar Girls are devious little old ladies! Glad Handsome Husband emerged relatively unscathed!

joei said...

i feel bad for handsome husband! LOL

enjoy the weekend!

joei
http://i.am/joei

mise said...

If they made that beautifully presented jam, I'll pop along myself, make a few purchases and merrily join in the hauteur.

Betty Manousos:cutand-dry.blogspot.com said...

Congrats on Handsome Husband!
Hope you're having a lovely day!
Bett xx

Wildernesschic said...

Women we are a breed apart... I keep warning my husband this. I hate all these WI things you are very brave. But I have to say the best place to buy cakes and preserves xx

daisychain said...

fabulous post.

E is for Eleanor said...

Hahaha this was brilliant! I wish I had a local WI sale to go to! x

Author in the making: said...

ha ha how cool, well done for handsome hubby. im sure he was quite overwhelmed :) i love your blog. plz visit me

Couture Carrie said...

Funny post, darling!
Love that last pic so!

xoxox,
CC

Tina Lane said...

Good buns can overcome anything.

Stopping by from SITS.

Torie Jayne said...

Wonderful post! Have a sweet day!

Faux Fuchsia said...

Dear NWLGITC
This is so funny- in Australia, on Thursdays outside my carpark in the city, a charity stall is set up and run by some really sweet pensioners who raise money for a church. They sell jams, biscuits, cakes and knitted products and the quality of everything is superior. Mr FF is their biggest fan and he and they flirt otrageously with each other. The clientel consists of solicitors and barristers because of the location. It's all pretty friendly really. I am over women not supporting each other at work let alone in line to buy jam and cake! xxxx

Duchess of Tea said...

Darling thanks so much for your sweet and caring comments. I treasure our friendship and wanted to wish you a lovely weekend and a love filled Valentine’s Day.

Love & Hugs
Duchess

Shelle said...

What a great post! Sounds like a trip to the "Saturday Market" they have foods stands and antiques and crafts. Always crowded!

Hope you have a wonderful weekend! Happy SITS Saturday!

jaz@octoberfarm said...

ooooo...i want to go to that market. happy sits day!!!

Amanda said...

I am sure it is not only because you are new around the area. Woman feel threated by other woman, ecspecially if the are attractive. Good Luck!

Babes about Town said...

Funny post, enjoy getting a glimpse into how the 'other half' lives. Being thoroughly city, not sure I could survive being countrified, but then again anything for love eh?

Do stop by my blog and if you or anyone are interested enter to win gorgeous Amoralia lingerie, our Valentine's giveaway!

http://babesabouttown.com/2010/02/amoralia-tasteful-lingerie-and-giveaway/

Julia, the Thanksgiving Girl said...

Ah how pretentious some people can be... I'm glad though that you got the insider info :)

Natasha said...

I have just read a few of your previous posts and really love your little snippets about life in England. I am going to go and make a big MUG of tea and read some more to catch up!

Love your blog!

Best wishes,
Natasha.

Nina said...

You are sooo lucky to have Handsome Husband!

English Rose ♥ said...

Poor Handsome Husband! Every girl needs one!!

Merci beaucoup for your sweet comment darling, it goes without saying that British designers are far superior to anyone else in the world =]

Stay safe and chic ma chérie,
English Rose x
http://iamanenglishrose.blogspot.com

Acting Balanced Mom said...

I love your writing style - I could totally picture dear hubby surrounded by a sea of grey and salt and pepper hair... Stopping by from SITS and glad I did :)

Michael St. James said...

i'm glad your handsome husband recovered...lol! lovely blog!

www.bagpoor.com

Rose said...

Oh your poor husband! how funny- they are very persistent ladies of a certain age!

Terence Sambo said...

lol, wonderful post, who knew there were extras for special customers...lol. U shld write a book. Everytime i'm on here i feel like i'm readin a novel wit diff unrelated chapters...

P.S: i love ur blog header :o]

Metropolitan Mum said...

Hahaha. I love that picture at the bottom.
Village life sounds very interesting!

Skooks said...

LOL. I was definitely NOT expecting that pic at the end of that post. Thanks for stopping by to visit my blog. Glad you know the ins and outs of getting the yummy cakes. (I suspect those ladies are rude because you are 1) younger and 2) they have food on their minds and came hungry.)

Sarah said...

Hello! What a hilarious post. The WI says it's trying to attract younger women to its membership so I'm shocked that you're getting such bitchy treatment. Maybe now that they've drooled over your poor husband they'll be nicer to you. Some women are like that.

sexylegsandbody said...

Hahaha, great post, very funny, I felt sorry for your hubby, until I saw his prize..

Thanks for dropping a line on my last post, always nice to hear from you.

Hope your legs improve in a flash... and have a super weekend.
Colin.

French Fancy said...

I wonder if husband swapping parties will now be on the agenda at the next WI meeting - with everyone hoping it will be 'handsome husband's' keys they pick up. Actually can you imagine anything more ghastly than going to anything like this - I just don't understand how people can do it.

Gill - That British Woman said...

we don't have the WI around here, I wish we did though.

Gill in Canada

sanjeet said...

If they made that beautifully presented jam, I'll pop along myself, make a few purchases and merrily join in the hauteur.
data entry work from home

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